"When you have nineteen children," I said.

Actually the thread started when a woman griped about a couple of teenagers standing on her doorstep. It did sound a little sketchy and someone did suggest calling the police which makes sense.

Someone else suggested answering the door with a shotgun and with that I couldn't resist.

"A shotgun only says you want to kill them. WHat you need is a Kukri. A Kukri says not only are you going to kill them but you are going to hack them up and throw them into the family stew pot," I replied.

Some Karen went off like a skyrocket babbling incoherently about the evils of cannibalism.

"Hey," I shot back. "I got a big family to support. You have to cut a few corners here and there. Every little bit helps."

Followed by more semi coherent babbling from Karen. "The police ought to get a search warrant and dig up your back yard!" is the gist of her babbling.

"They will find nothing. I give the bones to the neighborhood dogs. That's why I get along with them. Of course if they do decide to dig up my yard I hope they do it soon and save me the work. It's getting time to start my annual marijuana crop." I answered.

"What? You grow marijuana?!" She screeched.

"Yeah. I make a few bucks and so do the kids when they sell it at school. You have to do all you can to make a buck when you have nineteen kids," I said. 

"What?! What?!How can you possibly have nineteen children?!" asked Karen the soccer mom.

"Back when you were a little girl didn't your mother ever have a little talk with you and tell you where babies come from?" I answered.

"I know where babies come from,"she shot back. 

"Then why did you ask?" I answered.

"I'm going to tell the police about you!" she screamed.

"Don't bother. They read all of these internet boards and when you report it they will say, 'Oh. You're the moron that believes everything she reads and they will have a huge laugh about it at your expense!"

I'm sure she did and I'm sure they did.

And another Karen bites the dust.

I think she reported this to the mods and they had to do something. I got the boot for a couple of days.





To find out why the blog is pink just cut and paste this: http://piccoloshash.blogspot.com/2009/12/my-feminine-side-blog-stays-pink.html NO ANIMALS WERE HARMED IN THE WRITING OF TODAY'S ESSAY