Sunday, December 15, 2024

It would be a pretty good location for a strip club

The local Outback just closed and as usual the busybodies were wondering what was going to replace it. Of course some wag suggested a massage parlor so I jumped in there and pointed out that because it was set back and out of the way it would be the ideal spot for a strip club. Actually it would be an ideal location assuming the township would permit it. It's near enough to the main drag and set off enough not to mar the appearance of it. 

Needless to say, the township would not permit it. The township next to mine wouldn't even allow a dog groomer to open shop citing noise from dogs barking.

A couple of years back someone asked what was going to be built on a lot where she had seen excavation. I said that I had asked one of the guys running a bulldozer and it was  going to be a strip joint and an adult bookstore. (To be fair about it, he told me that he tells everybody who asks him the same thing wherever he is. I'd probably do the same thing. Why not? I knew he was a smartass when first laid eyes on him. )

What was wonderful to watch was a couple on their late 70s. The woman posted, 'Good! Now I will know where to find my husband!'.

The husband said that it would give his wife a job opportunity.

I'm still laughing at that one. It is truly a joy seeing an old couple go through life laughing with each other.

Then again that older couple probably were wise enough to know the township wouldn't permit it.

Needless to say there's always a few people that take the bait and one drama queen started screeching that now they'd have to move because she didn't want her children to be exposed to such a place and so on. It was a pretty good meltdown. Much moaning, wailing and gnashing of teeth. I'd give it a B+.

(God only knows what kind of a conniption she probably threw when she found out Donald Trump had won the presidency.)

Doesn't anybody even think anymore? A township that won't allow a dog groomer certainly isn't going to allow a strip joint. What was she thinking?

About 40 years ago I worked in one off and on as a utility man, keeping things fixed and maintained. It sure wasn't full time but several times I would talk with the owner who was most likely the manager because the place was likely mobbed up somehow.

The 'owner' was pretty free about talking about the business end of things and the rules (spoken and unspoken) One unspoken rule was that you NEVER hire local talent because it would raise a public outcry about what they were doing to our daughters.

He explained how the girls were hired through a 'talent agency' and that he had to maintain housing for them. Much of my work was keeping up a pair of condos that the girls were housed in. They were destructive as hell and tore things up frequently.

He had to watch illegal drug abuse among the girls, keeping it down to a dull roar. He admitted there was no way the headache could be completely eliminated.

The other thing he had to keep his eyes open for was prostitution which is the bane of strip club owners almost everywhere. The last thing an operator needs is accusations (true or not) of running a brothel alongside the club.    

Girls that got caught whoring were sent out of town on the first flight out, period. No ands, ifs or buts. Gone. Here's your ticket. Adios. They were also told that if they returned on their own nickel to ply the oldest profession they would be arrested.

One thing he liked were fresh faced college girls that were there for a single purpose, to make money. They caused far fewer problems and attracted a lot of business. Back then there were not too many of them. I remember one made enough to pay for her senior year. She returned the following summer to pay for a Master's. I had lunch with her a couple of times and respected her for focusing on her education. She was a hard luck story that wanted to better herself. She was intelligent and tough and not afraid to make sacrifices.

It's interesting to note that a few of these women stayed in town when their dancing contract was up, found legitimate jobs and assimilated into the general population and became respected members of the community.

Then he had to deal with the police and he explained that it was fairly easy if he could manage to keep things down to a dull roar and would help them out from time to time. If the cops were looking for someone that walked in he's simply pick up the phone and call it in. It was a case of one hand washing the other.

Still, while I probably don't want one in my town mainly because of the way it adds to the traffic and there's a lot of the clientele I don't care very much for. Still, back when I worked for the club I daresay that one of the local churches was a far bigger pain in the a$$ because they kept trying to force their beliefs down everyone else's throats and regulate everything.

FWIW I shacked up with one of the strippers for a brief period of time and later one of the local women I knew asked me what I saw in her. 

"Absolutely nothing," I replied. "I just figured it would look good on my resume."

She thought a moment and said, "You're right. Every scoundrel worth his salt should have a few things like that on his resume."

Then she blushed a bit and told me the time she ran off with a harmonica player from a blues band for a while.









To find out why the blog is pink just cut and paste this: http://piccoloshash.blogspot.com/2009/12/my-feminine-side-blog-stays-pink.html NO ANIMALS WERE HARMED IN THE WRITING OF TODAY'S ESSAY

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