Serving as an elected official pays so poorly then how come so many of them get filthy rich?
Riddle me that.
Yet a Billionaire gets elected to office and everyone wants pry into his personal finances.
Idiots.
Saturday, October 31, 2020
All I want to know is that if
Friday, October 30, 2020
It is a pain in the ass remembering passwords and I do not
dare putting them in an electronic file of any sort.
I guess I am just going to have to keep writing them down on my list and keep it hidden in the usual pile of papers like I have been doing all along.
Thursday, October 29, 2020
Time flies
Someone driving by stopped and said hello.
It was one of the kids that I was playing baseball with about 25 years ago when I sent one through the neighborhood grouch's window.
Of course we all ran like Hell and the kids hid me out and never ratted me out.
He's not a kid anymore. He's pushing 40.
We chatted briefly and he said that he's going to spend a few days with his folks around Thanksgiving and asked if I'd be home.
I told him that it was likely and he said he'd sneak out some evening and drop by with a bottle of scotch.
I hope he does as it will be interesting to see what he grew up to be.
I suppose when I get to St. Peter I'm going to have to do some real fast talking and fork over a couple of character references.
I figure that any guy that a bunch of baseball playing kids hid out and never ratted out ought to be pretty good references. I could sure do worse.
Wednesday, October 28, 2020
Something I did NOT post on Nextdoor.
You know who you are. I am only building a shoe It may not fit you. If it does fit, wear it.
One of the things you do not seem to mention or see it for what it is. We are transitioning from capitalism to socialism and FAST. Battle lines are being drawn and it's damned scary.
Recently at a rifle range I saw a pair of suburban housewives practicing with rifles. They were talking about interlocking fields of fire. What's WRONG with this picture? They should have been somewhere else talking about gardening instead of infantry tactics.
I personally know four middle aged women that have just purchased handguns. All of these women are professionals, not some kind of off brand hillbillies. We are talking about nurses, a small business owner, an insurance salesperson, those type of people. Self-defense classes are mobbed, especially women's classes.
Ask the next county sheriff deputy you see and he'll tell you that the busiest people in the Sheriff's office are the guys that issue concealed carry permits. The line is endless. As of last July they reported being stacked up until November.
Antifa/BLM has said repeatedly they are coming to the suburbs. The graffiti left behind says 'Liberals get the bullet, too.' so I don't think your Biden/Harris sign is going to help you very much.
It actually wouldn't take very much to subdue the 'burbs. Put a dot in the center of the city and swing a 20 mile radius and a handful of people could bring the suburbs to their knees in well under a week.
Terrorism works. All it would take is a handful of people determined to cause unrest and panic. A single shot through a window, a house burned here and there and suburbia would go into a complete panic.
Burning a few houses in a neighborhood would overlaod the fire department. It doesn't take a whole lot. Same holds true for the police department. Most people have no idea how fragile their life in the protected suburbs really is.
In fact they have little clue how fragile their life in itself is.
For what it's worth, an awful lot of suburban women seem to think that if anything happens then Officer Friendly will come to the rescue. Fat chance. Officer Friendly has a family, too and if things go truly sideways he will be staying with his family.
The Chief may tell you otherwise but candid conversations with rank and file officers say otherwise. In the event of a major event you are strictly on your own.
All of this sounds like I don't respect First Responders. That's wrong. I do. I simply understand their limitations. When push comes to shove you're on your own. Four fire truck can't put out six fires burning at the same time.
Actually there are two good reasons why BLM has stayed out of the 'burbs. First there is an election coming up and the first time they hit the suburbs an awful lot of Biden signs will come up and be replaced. The other is that they are pretty aware that an awful lot of money and power comes out in of burbs. The outcry would force the powers that be to react. Liberals would become conservatives overnight.
It's OK for them to burn down someone else's place in the city but it most certainly isn't OK to burn down OURS!
Don't worry, it'll probably come in time.
While we are on the subject of rioting and chaos, let's take a look at BLM. Alice Garza is a trained Marxist. BLM has also raised over a billion dollars and it doesn't seem to have improved any black lives I have heard of. I have not heard of one child getting a meal out of them nor one single youngster getting one cent towards college or trade school tuition. Where's the money going?
I have no idea but it's going somewhere. The cynic in me says some of it is going into guns and ammunition.
A trip to a sporting goods store for a box of deer hunting rounds was a wasted trip. All of the common calibers are sold out and if there is any out there it's well over a dollar a round and rising. I finally found someone to sell me five rounds so I can make opening day. Actually I probably won't do any shooting, anyway. Opening day to me is an excuse to take an old rifle for a walk in the woods. I would go without ammo. I have before. One year I went with a rifle incapable of firing. It was the best year I ever had I the field. No pressure to kill an animal and have to drag him to my vehicle.
Opening day is a great place to catch a wonderful refreshing nap under a tree.
At the store I spoke with one of the clerks. They are playing hell to keep merchandise in stock and he reported that well over half of the people buying were first time gun owners and on top of that over half of the new buyers are women. If you don't believe me take a trip to the firearms section of any sporting goods store and ask them yourself.
The clerk I spoke with said this isn't at all like the panics that takes place after a tragic event. People buy after such an event because they are trying to purchase something that will become outlawed. People are buying now because they are scared.
The perception to many is that this election isn't over Donald Trump and Joe Biden, it's over socialism. The election itself is a shit show. It's battle of the losers. Donald Trump? Joe Biden? This country can do better than that.
The belief is that Biden will be retired shortly after the election and Harris (a socialist) will take over. True or false, that's what a lot of people believe and you'll play hell telling them otherwise. Judging from Biden it's a reasonable bet. Joe is on his last legs.
A fairly large number of the people on the Nextdoor board are suburban woman and many of you live pretty sheltered lives. You get your news from the media, worry about soccer games, whatever. In short most of you are not out and about other than to Target, Giant Eagle and Walmart. A lot of you spend summer evenings with a bottle of white wine watching your kids at the neighborhood pool. You pay little attention to the world outside your general area. And why not?
You've never been in the Chaz/Chop zone in Seattle when it was occupied. I have. It scared the hell out of me. You have never talked with a Portland area person that has seen the damage there firsthand or had coffee with a co worker that just lost everything in a wildfire he believes was caused by leftist arson.
How many of you have seen a friend's truck vandalized because the vandals didn't like the candidate's bumper sticker he was displaying? Typical in Philly these days.
A couple visits to both left and right websites is an eye opener. On the left the very same people that were screaming for gun control a few short months ago are arming up. On the right it's pretty much the same except many of them are already hunters and trained shooters.
A lot of the Karens now are screeching about the Proud Boys and are afraid of them but they should be looking at Antifa. If anything the Proud Boys are trying to defend the cities against them. Have any Karens bothered to take a look at their website? They hide nothing. The rioting is caused by BLM and Antifa. Many of you support these rioters. It's easy to spot them. They have BLM signs out front.
Ask them if they support the rioting and you'll get a "Oh, well I..." and they'll hem and haw and try and give you a lecture on oppression or some other nonsense. They'll deny supporting the rioters but they'll send the very group tht is causing it a generous donation to assauge their guilt. (Guilty of what I would like to know)
Maybe it's because Karen gets her news and information from Rumor Control, CNN and the usual other fake news outlets which is par for the course. The bulk of them have no idea what the Constitution is and don't understand it.
To them it's a piece of parchment in Washington. Half of them don't know what the Bill of Rights is or what it means.
What a lot of them only seem to know is 'Orange man bad!'
What is noticible on both sides is that anyone with even a quarter of a brain is not looking forward to violence, especially those that have experienced it before. They think it is inevitible and cringe. Nobody on either side with any humanity wants to hurt another human being. Still, though, some people have no humanity.
Of course a lot of suburban women scream for gun control. Truth is that toothpaste came out of the tube in 1787 when the Constitution was ratified. A number of the states have outlawed certain classes of firearms with a remarkable lack of success. Those that have demanded firearms be turned in have displayed a truckload of them and declared victory. The truth is that the turn-ins account for about 5% or so.
The gun laws have made nobody any safer. Actually not too many laws make a citizen safer. There are an awful lot of stupid people out there that can't seem to figure this out. Drugs are illegal yet we certainly have more than our fair share of junkies. Incidentally there is a lot of heroin in the 'burbs these days. Fortunately it's at affordable prices so thefts and burglaries are not skyrocketing...yet.
These are the same people that will give up their rights for the perception of safety. What's sad is that when you give up your rights you become a lot less safe. You throw yourself at the mercy of a government. Any government that is big enough to give you what you want is big enough to take all you have.
We are getting ready to enter socialism and too many people can't see it even though it is right out there in front of you.
Among gunowners there has been a running joke for years. "I lost my guns in a tragic boating accident." Meaning, of course, they don't plan on turning them in.
It should also be noted that there is a significant number of home built weapons out there. It doesn't take a whole lot to build a firearm in one's shop. Also Three D technology had pretty made and real form of control of practically anything, guns included, moot.
All any gun control will do is create a black market and where black markets exist there is crime. It won't take any appreciable number of guns off the street.
The other day I had an interesting talk with a Vietnam era Navy Corpsman (Medic). He said back in 1967 that if he ever had to deal with another torn up body it would be too soon. He told me that he was actually packing up the old aid bag he took when he got out of the Navy and said that although it was too soon he would pitch in and do what he had to do. The man is in his early 70s.
About 40 years ago I knew someone just like him. He sewed up a cut I got while working on fishing gear while sitting at a bar in Alaska. He did pretty good job.
Personally, where will I be?
I am entering my 70th year soon and have had a good run. I have thoroughly enjoyed life in a Constitutional Republic. I am too old and tired to do much of anything. Ten years ago? Maybe.
Fact is I will be in my home trying to get by as best I can but I seriously do not think I will last very long because I will probably die of a broken heart.
I wanted to pass a constitutional republic on to the younger generation but it looks like it is not to be.
It gets scarier and scarier as time goes on.
I had a pretty different dream the other night.
I was in court and being sentenced and was laughing myself silly when he have me a 25 to life sentence.
The older you get the less of a deterrent a life sentence is.
Tuesday, October 27, 2020
Yes.
What do I mean by 'yes'?
What part of it.don't you understand?
Sometimes it REALLY IS that simple.
Same holds true for no.
Monday, October 26, 2020
I see a voter fraud machine in action
Two things.
They are accepting mail ins up to nine days after the election. While the ballots do have to have an election day postmark, that's just too damned easy to overlook.
The other thing is the signatures do not have to match on the envelopes. Apparently the League of Woman Voters argued it was unfair because they think someone might get cheated.
I'll tell you who will be cheated. the honest voters of Pennsylvania.
Saturday, October 24, 2020
I.stopped.to buy a burger the other day
and the person behind the counter seemed to have somewhat of an attitude topped off with a real classic 'I want to speak to the manager' hair style.
Her attitude told me she was doing a first class job of doing all of the things needed to make her miserable for the next fifty or so years.
Anyway, I checked my burger order carefully looking for something to be wrong with it which is something I never do. I'm really not picky and if I got the wrong kind of burger or something I seldom complain.
Still, I checked this order VERY carefully because I wanted to tell the sales girl that I wanted to speak to the manager.
Life follows art sometimes.
To find out why the blog is pink just cut and paste this:
http://piccoloshash.blogspot.com/2009/12/my-feminine-side-blog-stays-pink.html NO ANIMALS WERE HARMED IN THE WRITING OF TODAY'S ESSAY
Friday, October 23, 2020
Covid. Plan one.
Early on I realized that simply by traveling for work, getting food and stuff that I was probably going to be exposed to Covid 19 in one form or another. It's bound to happen.
While a lot of people were running around in panic I decided to take a different approach. I gathered all the scant information I could find and sifted through it. Age seemed to put me at high risk as did that I was a long time former smoker.
I looked at the other side of things. Covid is a flu and I have a history of not getting it. I have not had the flu in over 20 years. However the last time it knocked me for a loop for a couple of days. Still, for some reason the flu is a rare illness for me. This is a plus.
Recently I see where blood type enters the equation and mine seems to be at the top of the list. (Back when I was in the service Doc made note of my type in case someone needed a pint.)
I also have read where the long term homeless have developed some serious antibody systems. That actually made sense if you stop and think about it. The homeless live in total crud. When you live under a bridge in a pup tent and have no running water you tend to live differently.
A person that moves his bowels in the open about 15 feet from his living quarters, wipes himself with his hand and wipes his hand off with an old rag he found in a gutter and then goes and grabs a nasty skillet and cooks questionable chicken for lunch in it has three choices.
He either gets sick as hell, he outright dies or his immune system goes into high gear. Often the latter occurs after an extended period of just plain being sick all the time. His body adjusts and he's likely to be healthy as an ox.
This holds true for a lot of long term homeless shelter dwellers. They sleep in open squad bays full people coughing and sneezing all night but it seems the long term people seldom get sick.
Missionaries that have lived in the jungle have experienced the same thing. For the first few months they are sick as dogs and they either live or die. If they live they are healthy as the day is long.
So how does this effect my Covid strategy?
I'm realizing that I am very likely to eventually be exposed to it and I am going to do my best to keep my antibodies up and if/when I am exposed to it I'm hoping to rely on Mother Nature to fend it off. Or at least minimize the effects.
I have started taking vitamins C and D daily along with an elderberry and zinc supplement. These are pretty good for the immune system
I also don't over sanitize everything, either. After I cook the counter gets wiped unless I have cut up a chicken on it. If I do it gets wiped and I hit it again with a little bleach water because chicken can get nasty. I just do basic, simple cleaning. I don't want things too clean.
When leave the house I do clean my hands often and when I return before I enter the house. When I'm home, either in or outside I wash my hands after using the toilet and before cooking but not much more than that and especially not after working outside. I want my antibody system to ramp up and stay there. Organic dirt is pretty good for the immune system.
It's part of a plan.
Of course, even though it is of questionable value, I mask up religiously if I am shopping or near people. It doesn't hurt and may have some value. It also keeps the Karens off of my ass. These are the idiots that truly believe that their daisy print masks are going to save the world and I am tired of saying ''Tell it to my parole officer." to them when they say something when I am a block away.
I also sanitize shopping carts and minimize touching handles.
It's probably not a perfect plan but it's a reasonably well thought out plan based on basic logic, an examination of my strengths and weaknesses. It's certainly not foolproof but it's a whole lot better than panicking and running around like a germophobe. It's an attempt to use the run of the mill germs out there to keep my resistance up.
It makes more sense to me than the Karens running around scrubbing their kids with bleach every five minutes and lowering their resistnce. They try and create a sterile enviornment and when they leave the house and pick something up.
It seems almost every germophobe I know is always catching colds and getting every brand of flu that passes through.
Anyway that's the plan. While I do try my best to avoid the disease I also think it's likely I'm going to be exposed so I
figure that beefing up the immune system is a good idea.
It's certainly not a foolproof plan but it's a reasonably well thought out plan and is a damned sight better than none. It's also one hell of a lot better plan than most suburban women can come up with because a lot of them don't have a brain in their head.
Thursday, October 22, 2020
People often ask for too much out of things.
The other night radio propagation in my area last night just plain sucked. I had a terrible noise floor and only strong signals could get through.
I mentioned this to someone and they said ham radio was unreliable and as an extension it was no good.
Of course the usefulness of it is that it works when nothing else does because it needs no infrastructure.
People tend to put unrealistic demands on things.
Wednesday, October 21, 2020
I swear. If an employer offered to pay someone's mortgage
in exchange for a $10/day pay cut there are an awful lot of idiots that would screech about how someone was trying to rip them off.
It's the same group that wants the pay raise to come in the form of taxable cash instead of non-taxable benefits even if the offered benefit package would cost them $150/ day if they had to buy it themselves.
Let's do a little math. The schedule many seamen work is equal time on/off for 182.5 paid days annually. Ten bucks a day would come to about $1850 annually which seems to be what a lot of people have for a monthly mortgage these days. It does vary, but even at a grand a month we're looking at an incredible deal. A grand a month is $12,000 per year and $10/day is 1825 per year. In effect it would mean a $10K annual raise.
It doesn't get any better than that yet there are a number of idiots that would screech blue bloody murder that the company was trying to rip them off.
Of course there are not a whole lot of companies out there that would make such a deal to their employees but the point is that there are a lot of stupid people out there that don't know when they are getting a good deal.
A lot of this mentality is probably why there are so many Biden voters out there. They don't stop and think about what's really good for them. They just react and run with their emotions. Orange man bad.
Tuesday, October 20, 2020
Yes, it's Uncle Al, the kiddie's pal.
Buying a can of hard lemonade the other night at a convenience store.
Behind me in line, properly socially distanced was a group of three teenaged girls and a boy.
I got to the register and had to dig out my ID even though I am an old man. I turned to the teenagers behind me and in my best Uncle Al, the kiddie's pal voice said, "I'm Uncle Al, the kiddie's pal and I've got my ID out! Who needs beer and cigarettes?"
Those kids are not stupid. They're quick on the uptake. They raised their hands and replied in a laughing voice, "I do! I do!"
The clerk at the register started laughing. He knew sarcasm when he sees it. More important, so did the kids.
The stuffy looking woman behind the teenagers took the bait and went off like a skyrocket.
Much to the teens credit, they looked at her, pointed at her and laughed. Of course the indignant woman carried on that buying for kids is against the law.
So I looked at her and said, "Hey, Lady! You gonna tell my parole officer and put me back in the joint? That's not fair, Lady! I just got out of the joint!"
The clerk and the teenagers really started laughing and the woman looked at me like I was the Ghost of Charles Manson and left.
I have said this before. I used to think God hated me because he gave me too many stupid people to deal with. I was wrong. God loves me because he sends me so much entertainment.
Monday, October 19, 2020
I see a bad moon rising.
Trump winning the election is only a case of kicking the can further down the road. We're headed straight to outright communism with a speed bump of socialism.
I am not willing to live under socialism. I won't live that way.
I am beginning to believe that I will not die of natural causes and that's fine by me. I will either live free or die. Makes no nevermind. I've had a pretty good run.
One of the things that I do enjoy now is the heady feeling of freedom I get when I realize now that a life sentence isn't really much of a deterrent for me.
Over the years I have had very few brushes with the law which is interesting because I have paid little heed to the laws of our nation. I have preferred to live by my own. I am most certainly not alone here.
The reason I have not wound up in jail is most likely because I have pretty much chosen to live fairly responsibly. People who do this seldom have brushes with the law under a reasonable Constitutional Republic.
Responsible people don't need a very large government. Big governments are for irresponsible people and those that don't want to take care of themselves.
I plan on continuing my lifestyle to the end and if the powers that be don't like it then that's the way it is. Throw me in jail. I care less and less by the day.
I am becoming convinced that the appointment of Amy Comey Barrett to SCOTUS is a last ditch effort.
While I have to say she is a breath of fresh air because she will defend the Constitution as a non partesian justice, it's only going to be a short time, though, until the Dems pack SCOTUS with liberal judges and the entire Constitution get thrown out.
I have said it before and I'll say it again, liberals destroy everything they touch. They are the reason we can't have nice things.
Sunday, October 18, 2020
Some guy griped about his daughter dating a pizza delivery guy.
For Christ's sake, the guy is still in school. He's trying to make ends meet between classes. Did dear old dad think his college freshman daughter was going to start dating the CEO of General Motors? Get realistic.
"Hey, asshole," I said. "Your daughter is doing rather well. Her boyfriend has a job, owns a car and always has a pizza. Were you doing that well as a college freshman?"
Crickets.
He ought to be grateful, too. His daughter doesn't have two sleeves of ink, a bone in her nose and has natural colored hair which is a plus as far as the way I look at things.
Friday, October 16, 2020
I can hear the President at his next rally.
"I've had Covid. I went to Walter Reed and I'll say it's the finest hospital I have ever been to and I was flattered when the Sp/4 that saw me come in said. "Mr. President, you're my Commander in Chief and the only civilian entitled to a salute. We're going to treat you like one of us!"
"I've never been so flattered in my life! Our soldiers said I was one of them! Nobody has ever said anything so nice to me before. Our brave warriors said I was one of them."
"Then he handed me 2 Moutrin and told me to drink plenty of water and come back during normal sick call hours, which I did and they took great care of me. God bless the people at Walter Reed! They treated me like one of them!"
THAT would go over a LOT of people's heads!
Thursday, October 15, 2020
Do not use dynamite cases as moving boxes even though they are ideal.
I have not seen a dynamite box in about three decades but they used to be very tough, heavily waxed cartons that were ideal for use as moving boxes in every aspect but one. They are labeled as being Dynamite cartons.
It is not a good idea to use these boxes as moving boxes because if people see them stacked up in your house while you are moving in they generally jump to conclusions and have been known to call the police.
The other thing that isn't really a good thing to use are surplus pine ammunition boxes unless you paint them over. When people see pine obviously military boxes stenciled (for example) 60 mm mortar rounds they also jump to conclusions.
Using these things to move your good with isn't really a very good idea. It wasn't a good idea 30 years ago when I moved and it's not a good idea now.
Wednesday, October 14, 2020
Another political phone call
"Hello. What political candidate are you trying to tell me to vote for?"
"Oh, we're an enviornmental group," the caller answered. Slick. Nice try. I already know where this is going. She's going to try and slide into talking to me about voting for someone, probably Biden.
"Are you working?" she asked.
"I just got back in from sea," I replied. "I flew in from Tokyo yesterday. I work for a Japanese maritime company."
"You work at sea? How exciting! What do you do?"
"I'm a harpooner on a whaling vessel," I replied.
It went straight downhill from there.
Tuesday, October 13, 2020
Well, I made it onto someone else's $hit list.
I got my first election doorknocker that didn't bother to see the 'Go Away' sign or the 'Come back with a warrant' door mat.
I'll admit if she was a Trumper I would have probably thrown her out in a bit of a kinder manner but she wasn't.
She was a rabid Biden voter and ignored me when I quietly told her to leave. I was going to raise my voice and simply throw her ass out but decided a little humiliation was in order. I decided to set a trap.
"You mean the Donald Trump you say wants to grab your pussy?" I asked and she took the bait and ran with it. She went on and on over that one.
"Lady, go home." I said. 'Put a mirror between your legs and take a long, hard look at that nasty old thing of yours. Then you can come back here and tell me that a New York billionaire really wants to grab it. I'd bet my kid brother's Basset hound has better makin's than you."
I fully exected to be physically attacked but to my surprise I wasn't. I didn't even get the satisfaction of a good screech. She stood there with a look of total outrage on her face with smoke pouring out her ears. It was actually rather amusing but it was also disappointing.
She left and my plans were foiled.
I was hoping she would attack me because then I would have had her arrested. I'm tired of messing around with those people.
Monday, October 12, 2020
The last couple of months I was in the service I slowed down a bit.
I didn't become a goof-off or a slacker but I do recall I didn't still have that hard charging spirit that got me promoted ahead of my peers.
I had seen too much of a system that seemed to pnish people for being good at their jobs. All too often I would hear someone up the chain tell Top to 'put a good man on it' and find myself in charge of some dopey detail or other task.
A fellow Sp/5 put it very accurately. He said, "The duds get over."
When he said that he was 100% spot on. The duds DID get over.
Looking back on it things ere that way because most of the staff and platoon sergeants were too lazy to get off their asses and actuallly lead some of those people. It was easier just to let them hide out and avoid much of the drudgery.
Of course the duds didn't get promotions but they didn't have to bust their asses too much, either.
I remember two details that I led cleaning up trash in the field. There was certainly no shortage of it. An infantry battalion in a day or two can create a pretty good collection of C-ration cans and boxes and although the BnCO gives orders to keep the perimeter clean an awful lot of stuff gets by.
The first time I got assigned this job I was assigned three good men, a Jeep and a trailer. We went down gathered a trailerload of trash and headed on back into garrison. We were back in time for noon chow and I reported to Top immediately. I told him I wanted to give the three guys the resst of the day off because they didn't fritter around. They got the job done quickly and did a good job.
Done deal. I went to the mess hall and told the guys thay had the afternoon off.
A while later the detail came around again. It rotated between several battalions and every few months our battalion would get it and the BnCO would give it to Headquarters Battery, where I was located.
Top assigned me to it the second time and for some reason lost in time I was given two duds and a halfway decent guy to get the job done.
All three of them heard that I had given the last group the afternoon off. They were looking forward to the same thing. Instead I made it clear to them that this could be either a half day job or a two or three day job and it was up to them.
They started to complain and I told them that it was going to be done, and done well and when it was done they could go home.
The two duds lookedd at each other and the other guy looked at them and said he had no intention of spending the entire day out in the boonies and we had best just do it, and get it done and over with.
I suppose the man's size and ability with his fists made some of the difference but the two duds buckled down and got it done.
Again, we were in by noon and I reported to Top. He asked me how I had managed to get the two of them to get the job done. I told him that I had given them no choice and I was willing to spend days out there until it was done. I also mentioned that the third guy, the worker was pretty good with his fists. Top grinned.
That left me with a craw in my throat because I was doing the job that the staff and platoon sergeants were supposed to do. They should have motivated those two a long time earlier.
Of coursse, the two duds went back to being duds the second we returned because their platoon sergeants would let them but I did manage to get a day's work out of the pair.
Still, a number of things like that soured me on the army and when I became a short timer I wasn't quite as motivated as I had been.
There was a field problem when I was down to about three weeks and I squirmed out of it. It would have been a waste of everyone's time, the Army's and mine. I would have returned to the battery after the field exercise and started clearing post the next day.
What's interesting is that my First Sergeant knew how I squirmed out and quietly told me he thoought I was pretty slick.
I drank a bunch of quinine (tonic) water and ate a bunch of poppy seeds the night before a drug test and promptly popped hot and was pulled to the hospital for further testing that proved I was clean.
The trip to the hospital saved me. I spent the time the battery was in the field manning the phones in the barracks along with another couple of guys on light duty.
Anyway I was a decent soldier but I couldn't see making a career of it at the time.
Saturday, October 10, 2020
My paramedic
Narcanned your honor student.
I heard someone say "We've lost the Surpreme Court."
What happened? Did Trump lose it in a crap game in the Rose Garden the other night?
Friday, October 9, 2020
One of the things that makeslife great is running into people with the same sense of humor.
I was traveling a while ago and had to check into a motel that I have used from time to time.
Those new electronic so-called keys suck and the woman behind the counter asked me if I wanted two of them. She knew that they were somewhat unreliable and wanted to give me a spare. I was very considerate of her but there are some openings that create a Pavlovian situation.
"That would be great! I can give one to the hooker I met in the parking lot!" I answered.
She didn't bat an eyelash. "What's she charging? Maybe I can give you a better deal." she replied.
GREAT comeback and it rates as number two over the years.
The all time best was when I asked the woman at the desk of a hotel/restaurant in Kodiak. "Do you have reservations?" I was referring to the restaurant.
"Just beastiality," she replied.
One of the things I like about myself is that by being a World Renowned Smart Ass is that on rare occasions kindred spirits recognize it and shoot back.
It's kind of nice being shot with a ball of your own $hit once in a while.
Thursday, October 8, 2020
I wuz busy
Galklivnting across the country today
Wednesday, October 7, 2020
I see where Armenians blocked a highway in southern CA.
Blocking highways has gotten pretty stale if you ask me.
The excuse that the protesters use is they want to make the public aware of their cause.
Perhaps the protesters should be made aware of the cause of the people they are blocking. Their cause is feeding their wife and kids and they don't want to be late for work. Feeding women and children is always a good cause.
Some states have make my day laws.
We need a keep me from being late law.
Make it legal to run over protesters and the problem will go away.
It's really quite simple. Most things are.
In fact if you enact a law like that I will start carrying a passenger instead of driving alone. That way of I miss a protester with my fender the passenger can get them with the door.
Some people can't understand a simple concept like gravity.
One time many, many moons ago I watched a guy with a background in engineering trying to install a pump in a fishing boat. The pump was to transfer fuel from a fifteen gallon tank to an oil stove. He was out there trying to find an out of the way place to mount the pump when Timmy happened on by.
Now Timmy wasn't the sharpest tool in the shed. We figured that somewhere along the line he had just a touch of Down's. He watched the skipper for a few minutes and said, "Gee! I wish I could figure that out. If I did it I would have mounted the tank on the overhead and used gravity because I don't know how to set up a pump like that!"
About a minute later a red faced engineer was asking Timmy to help him get the fifteen gallon tank up onto the coachroof.
I watch people all the time go through a lot of rigamarole to do things that are in fact quite easy to do because they seem to be unable to figure out how gravity works.
Of course sometimes gravity works too good and you have to slow it up a bit. One can't simply toss a safe out of a third story window and not expect something bad to happen but you get the general idea. Gravity can be your friend and the price is right.
Tuesday, October 6, 2020
So Eskimo Pies got woke and decided to change their name, huh?
Change it to Baby Seal Pops.
Club that appetite!
Monday, October 5, 2020
The other day we spoke of trashy looking top heavy bleached
blonds.
Let's look at the other end of the spectrum. Like the day I told the Walmart greeter that asked how I was. I told him I had a nasty cocaine hangover and my girlfriend had told me she's pregnant.
The woman behind me stuck her nose into it and asked me how old my girlfriend is.
I looked at her and cheerfully told her "I'm helping her get her driver's license next week, however old that is."
Pavlov was right. I just HAD to say that.
It's a case of instinctively giving an answer to leave someone outraged and someone else amused.
Needless to say, the Walmart guy was quite amused.
I have told this story before but it shows I am fairly flexible in what I can pull out of my ass on short notice. It's quite often scary.
Sunday, October 4, 2020
Sometimes I scare myself.
One time recently a young buck asked me what kind of women I chased when I was his age.
"Trashy looking top heavy bleached blond divorcees between the ages of 35 and 55," I replied. It was an apply anywhere smart assed answer that I pulled out of my hat instinctively.
The answer came to me out of nowhere and just rolled off of my tongue with no second thought even though it was bull$hit.
Sometimes it scares me when something like that just flows out of my mouth. I guess my sarcasm is Pavlovian.
Saturday, October 3, 2020
Someone suggested legalizing prostitution
which I agree with in principle but I am taking a dim view of what it would be like realistically. The government would frig up a whorehouse up to a fare-thee-well.
Any decent talent would probably stay in the shadows and work illegally, though. That's where the money would probably be if the governmental rules were applied to a brothel.
First of all Uncle Sam would probably require all madams to hire a quote of handicapped and put racial quotas on the girls and on and on until a guy would walk into the whorehouse parlor and see a collection of female nightmares.
There's be the drooler in a wheelchair sitting there working a coloring book, some other woman that fell out of the ugly tree and broke every branch on the way down. Simply checking out a legalized whorehouse parlor would be like a visit a carnival freak show.
I do believe the government is incapable of runninng a whorehouse that sells whisky without a colossal subsidy.
Friday, October 2, 2020
Ahh, Yes. The Foreign Legion... They actually saved my life back in the 70s.
This is one of those things that is a pain in the ass to talk about because everyone jumps to conclusions when I say the FFL saved my life.
Needless to say there are two stories, pick one.
First, I ran off with the Sheik of Araby's beautiful dark eyed daughter by stealing his prize horse, scooping her up behind me and galloping off into the darkness of the desert with about 2000 gold toothed greasy A-rabs* chasing us.
We made it to Fort Zindenauf ahead of them and when they charged the fort I won the Legion of Honor for shooting 38 consecutive A-rabs off of a camel's back.
After that we left the fort and were mio chased through the Seven Cities of Gold, Phoenix, Tuscon, Las Vegas to name a few. We were chased day and night and were nearly caught every time we turned around.
Finally we escaped disguised as hillbillies and found peace and security in Pittsburgh in our lovely little house in the suburbs with a white picket fence and our 2.3 children.
Needless to say when I tell that story and the listener sits there agape not one of them has the brains to ask how they managed to get 38 A-rabs on the back of a camel. Even the Marx Brothers could not pull that one off although they did do a splendid job of cramming about that many people into a small ship's cabin in 'A Night at the Opera'.
Then, of course, there's always the truth which never seems to be quite as colorful.
Back when I got out of the army I was living in a tipi in the Rockies. I knew that that was not goinng to last forever so I decided to look for something interesting to do after I left the tipi. I considered becoming a game warden of some sort in Africa because I loved living in the outdoors and wanted to do something to protect the wildlife.
I wrote practically every country in Africa asking about employment as a game warden. When I mentioned this to someone they suggested I also write the FFL because at the time they were supposedly involved in some sort of law enforcement in the African French holdings.
I got no reasonable offers. Africa was (and probably still is) a mess and about half of my letters went unanswered.
Those that replied were not looking for gamekeepers but mercenary soldiers. What was then Rhodesia offered me a enlistment in the Rhodesian army with an opportunity to try out for the Sealous Scouts. Be a man among men, said the posters of the Scouts.
Sorry. Not interested.
The last letter to trickle in came from of all things, the Legion. It was not a recruiting letter but a well thought out piece of advice that I change my plans as being a game warden in most of Africa was likely to end for me with a bullet in the back of my head and being eaten by hyenas.
The Legionnaire that wrote it had taken the time to recommend to me that I seriously reconsider my plans for a number of well thought out reasons. Among others was that certain Rhino horns were worth over 30,000 mid-1097s US dollars.
When you consider the average house cost of the time was about 25K you can see that the possession of such an animal part would lead to a rather heated discussion conducted with firearms.
Based on the letter I got from the Legion I changed my plans and I do believe it saved my life.
*A-rabs are not to be mistaken for Arabs that really exist. A-rabs area figment of a Hollywood screenwriter's imagination and in general bear no resemblence to people in the Arabic parts of the world.
It really isn't as colorful as running off with the Sheik's beautiful daughter but it remains that the French Foreign Legion did save my life.
Thursday, October 1, 2020
Some people get it.
Yeah, it was an unprofessional thing to say but I did it anyway.
When someone asked me how I was faring the Covid 19 epidemic I casually told them it wasn't too bad because the liquor stores were open and I found a coupla strippers and dope dealers that make house calls.
Captain Sarcasm strikes again.
I had to listen to a "What? Strippers? Drugs?"flip out from the person that asked me about how I was handling Covid which is to be expected.
One time at sea I had a can of starting ether in my back pocket while I was washing a particularly greasy skillet. I took it out of my pocket and put it on the counter next to the sink.
My shipmate walked in and saw the ether and asked me why it was in the galley in the first place.
'This skillet is plenty greasy," I replied.
Of course he was on to me and replied "We're low on ether. Why don't you just get some MTBE out of the sample locker."
That was more like it.
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