Wednesday, June 13, 2012

I just heard the news about the hoax

 that was perpetrated on the Coast Guard regarding the yacht explosion that was reported seventeen miles off the Jersey coast. An awful lot of tax dollars got spent sending resources out on a wild goose chase.

While I am an admirer of the harmless hoax or the wild rumor, I have no patience with someone that would pull a stunt like that. I hope they nail the bastard and force him to repay every cent that was spent by the Coast Guard. Force the twisted little geek into moving under a bridge under I-95 and make him live on McDonald's hamburgers, Ex-Lax and Spam until the bill is paid.

In other news, a couple of days ago I was at the counter at Pep Boys asking a question about inverters, which I was looking for. A woman came in looking for a battery for her car. Her hubby had sent her to pick one up because the one in the older of their 2 vehicles had out and out died.

She was asking something or another about a 10% off coupon that she had forgotten to bring with her.

I caught the clerk's eye and was feeling a little flippant. Besides, I wanted to get her out of the way. This looked like she was going to go through the pouty act to try wheedle a 10% discount. "Give her 10% off based on my good looks," I said.

The clerk grinned and told me he ought to charge her 20% more because of my bad looks. Then he looked thoughtfully and had an idea.

"I can do that," he said. "I can peel 10% off."

At that point the broad should have simply said 'thank you' and shut the hell up but there are an awful lot of people that do not know when to quit while they are ahead. She's apparently one of these.

"How about MY good looks?" she asked. "Is that good for another 10%?"

The clerk didn't look too pleased because he didn't like the position she had put him in. I figured that if I had gotten him into the situation, I should get him out of it. I put on my best Bogey voice.

"Shister, in thish town you ain't nothin but jusht another pretty face," I said.

What I wanted to say is that she was butt-ugly but that would not have accomplished anything but to piss her off and make everyone around uncomfortable. She deserved it for being greedy. She had transformed herself from looking like a fairly intelligent woman to just another dumb broad in a second simply by opening her mouth.

So I was tactful. She didn't feel too insulted and the clerk didn't have to refuse her.

I knew what the clerk was going to do. He was going to simply write the sale and make it look like one of the small garage owners that have an account there had come in and paid cash for the part. This is actually a win/win for the small garage owner as at the end of the year it will make him look like a bigger customer than he really is.

She paid for her battery and someone went to get it and I got my answers about the inverter and headed outside. I was in the open Miata and parked right outside the door. I hopped in and the guy carrying the battery and the woman was behind him.

I figured she'd at least thank me for getting her about ten bucks off but instead she looked at me and asked me why I interrupted her when she was trying to get another 10% off.

"Lady, you do not know when to quit," I said. "When someone gets you a deal, simply say 'thank you' and shut up about it. The clerk was NOT supposed to do that but he did. You put him in a spot when you got greedy. I got him out of it and you still got your 10%. Be grateful that you got that. After all, he's not the one that forgot your coupon."

She started to look like she was going to get uppity but thought twice. I think she sensed correctly she was going to be eaten alive if she did get uppity on me. She changed her mein instantly.

"Thank you," she said, simply.

"You're welcome," I replied.

Some people just do not know when they are ahead and when to keep their mouth shut.

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