Tuesday, August 29, 2017

So you are taking a two year old godson out with you.

 You have him by the hand and someone you have not seen in about 40 years or so recognizes you and asks if it’s your grandson.

Now there is no way in hell I can let that one slide. To let an opportunity like that slide would be a pretty sad state of affairs.

You put on kind of a sheepish embarrassed look. “It’s actually my son.”

“What!! Your SON?! Really?’ is the likely reply.
“Yeah, well that’s the way things go,” I’d reply. “You know how life is full of little surprises. There was this bachelor party a while back and I hadn’t been out drinking in years and forgot my limit. Then someone brought out the blow and I haven’t had any of that in decades. Things started to get out of hand then.”

Then I’d continue. “We started doing as few lines off of the stripper’s ass and I guess she had some kind of daddy issues and a thing for older men. Anyway things got a little strange and one thing led to another and I found out I am now a father.”

By now they are probably totally agape.

“After the boy was born his mother went back to the drug scene so I had the state give me custody. It’s worked out pretty well, actually. I gave up drinking and smoking so I can be around longer to raise him.”

You can bet the farm that a wild story like that is going to get around.

You may sit back and wait until the next reunion and know good and well that you are going to be met with a lot of questions. Of course the fun doesn't stop here.

"What? What son?" I reply. "I don't have any children. Someone must have mistaken me for someone else."

THEN you sit back because someone is going to look foolish. 

To find out why the blog is pink just cut and paste this: http://piccoloshash.blogspot.com/2009/12/my-feminine-side-blog-stays-pink.html NO ANIMALS WERE HARMED IN THE WRITING OF TODAY'S ESSAY

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