Reasonable expectations

One of the things you have to do when dealing with someone is to have reasonable expectations.

I was in the process of watching a neighbor trying to sell a car that was her dad's and it is pretty funny to have watched some of the people that have come over to look at it.

The car is about 12 years old and has a shade under 60,000 miles on it and I know for a fact that it has been very well maintained. The price is well under the going rate for a vehicle of that model with 100,000 miles on it and the truth is she is simply trying to move it.

I got involved in this one day when I was over her place fixing something.

Some greasy little twerp started in on telling her everything that was wrong with the thing. Actually it was in pretty damned good shape. He went on and on and on about this and that.

I saw where this was going and interrupted.

"How about if we just give you the car along with a check for ten grand AND a bottle of whiskey that you are probably too cheap to buy for yourself. Then we can come by and wash it for you and send over three hookers a week for you and after you drive it off, I will shoot this woman for trying to charge you a less than fair price for a damned good car. Now either cough up some cash or put an egg in your shoe and beat it."

I turned to my neighbor who was also mad at the little twerp. "Call 911."

"The cops?" she asked.

"Nah, get an ambulance...the hell with it, call the coroner's" I replied.

"Why?" she replied, "I have a shovel handy. We'll bury him in your yard."

"Why mine?" I asked.

"Because we buried the last two in mine," she replied.

"Yeah, but that's because I got the three kids selling magazines parked in mine," I answered. "Remember them? They were on the milk carton for months. Besides, this guy is Italian and it ain't right to bury him. You're supposed to throw them off of a bridge in cement overshoes."

"I'd forgotten about that," she said. She looked thoughtfully. "I have a five-gallon pail," she said, brightly.

"OK, here's what you do. Take my truck and go to Lowes and get us a couple bags of Sakrete and while you're gone, I'll ice this little thug," I said, handing her my keys. "Later tonight when the cement sets we'll toss him off the 40th Street Bridge."

He got angry at being mocked and left, and that Saturday was then shot because we opened beer up as soon as he took off because we were laughing so hard. An hour later someone else showed up.

He was a guy with a wife and a couple of kids. He looked at it, took it around the block and took it. He knew a good deal when he saw one. He was looking for a good used car and he saw a good deal on one. He knew it wasn't going to get a whole lot better than this. It was actually better than he had expected to find. His expectations had been realistic and they had been exceeded.

He was so grateful he went down to the beer distributors and got us a case because we were already too toasted to drive ourselves. He even bought it for us.



my other blog is: http://officerpiccolo.blogspot.com/ http://piccolosbutler.blogspot.com/