Friday, April 3, 2015

One of the things I liked about Alaska in the late 70s

 was the way whiners were dealt with.

I wanted a bottle of wine one spring day when I was ont ou Cape Chiniak road. It was a glorious day and I had a nice young lady with me. We walked barefoot on a beach and decided to get a bottle of wine to go with lunch and have lunch on the beach.

There was a road house of some sort on Cape Chiniak Road and they sold wine. They were not very far away so we simply hopped into my old pickup and off we went.

I hadn't bothered to put my shoes back on which was rare for Kodiak. Without thinking I wandered into the joint barefoot. I walked up to the bar and ordered a bottle of Lancer's rose and suddenly got an earful from some out of town dude sitting at a table.

He was bellyaching about my bare feet and making a big to-do about nothing. I was going to be in and out in a second. All I wanted was a quick jug to go.

The bartender rolled his eyes. He really just wanted to give me my damned bottle of Lancer's and send me on my way. He didn't really care if I was shod or not. He actually wished HE was outside and barefoot.

"Pic," he said, softly. "The guy is legally right. Why don't you humor him."

I rutned to the pickup empty-handed and told my date what had happened. She handed me my shoes and noticed I was taking my pants off. I have to give her a lot of credit. SHe grinned. "Is that how this one is going to go?" she asked, laughing.

"A man's gotta do what he's gotta do," I replied.

"I gotta see this," she said, and ran into the roadhouse and made a beeline for the bar.

The instant she was seated I wandered in wearing only a pair of shoes and a shirt. The bartender took one look at me. His eyes grew for an instant and he regained his composure. He took one look at me.

"That's more like it," he said. He handed me the bottle and I handed him a twenty.

The diner went stark staring bonkers! He was completely outraged. His wife laughed like hell, adding to his anger.

The bartender looked at the outraged diner in feigned innocence. 'What?" he asked the diner.

"That guy isn't wearing any pants!" he shouted.

"So?" replied the bartender. "He's got shoes and a shirt on. What more do you want?"

The bartender handed me my change and I wandered back to my pickup and put my pants back on. My date followed me out and laughed like hell as I pulled them up.

Back in the day there that is how we handled whiners. 

We simply gave then something to whine about.

To find out why the blog is pink just cut and paste this: NO ANIMALS WERE HARMED IN THE WRITING OF TODAY'S ESSAY

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