Friday, May 26, 2017

Stop trying to save me from myself.

You know who you are and you know what you are doing.

Leave things alone. Stay the hell out of my things and leave thins as I have set them. You are doing me no favors when I find myself roasting or freezing at 0300 because you decided to reset the thermostat to save 12 cents.


Another thing to you know who you are.

Stop getting all worked up and overly sensitive when I start talking about my final arrangements. I do not like it when you act like a dumbass and start fawning all over me like I'm on a death bed and getting ready to up and die. Quit it. Now, dumbass. Shut up and learn something.

First of all I'm in pretty good health which is exactly the proper time to take care of final arrangements. I have no plans of going anywhere in the near future.

Of course you are probably agog wondering why I am making my plans now when I am still healthy so your dumbassedness is probably shifting into high gear. You're thinking along the 'You can't fool me' lines and think that I am hiding my upcoming demise.

The truth is I am being sneaky. I am having my will taken care of while I am healthy so I can keep you in line for the rest of my days by threatening to cut you out of it.


Another thing about the way things are going.

I am sore now from dumping a motorcycle recently. I was practicing up for my road test to get my license endorsed with a motorcycle rating when I dumped it. Truth is I made a rookie mistake.

I did get somewhat banged up as to be expected but none of it was life threatening or serious I was bruised up pretty good.

Of course someone asked me why I was trying to get a motorcycle endorsement at my age.

What am I supposed to do?” I asked. “Think I ought to wait another ten or fifteen years?”

The time to do something is when you can and in a way I should be upset with myself for not doing this a long time ago.

On the other hand there is a certain elan to dumping a motorcycle at the age of 65 and then getting back on it and tooling on down to take a road test while just a few minutes later covered with fresh road rash and freshly bruised up.

I think that in one sense I am going to call this one perfect timing.


Someone asked me what I was doing on a motorcycle at my age. I told them I was headed down to the Social Security office to pick up my check.

He looked stunned.

To find out why the blog is pink just cut and paste this: NO ANIMALS WERE HARMED IN THE WRITING OF TODAY'S ESSAY

No comments:

Post a Comment