Wednesday, June 29, 2016

Spaghetti on paper plates.

Ah, yes. There is nothing quite like serving nice, wet partially drained spaghetti on cheap paper plates.

The instant the spaghetti hits the plate it gets soggy and loses what little ability it had to stay remotely in any kind of shape.

It's not so bad if you are simply putting spaghetti on a plate that is already on the table at the place setting.

The fun starts when you serve buffet style and people have to take a heavy plateful of spaghetti on a cheap paper plate somewhere to eat it.

When you do this it is preferable to supply a table and not have everyone try to juggle the soggy mess on their laps. Without a table people will be cleaning up for weeks.

Carrying a plateful of wet spaghetti to the table requires quite some skill. If you put one hand under the plate the outsides will start to tip and everything will start to slip off. When you move your fingers to lift the edges of the plate it will instantly contort to a U shaped affair and everything will slide out of both ends looking like Niagara Falls.

It's generally best to use both hands under the plate to support it. When you get to the table you have to toss the plate up slightly to get your hands out from under it so it lands on the table with a wet plop.

Where it lands is where it stays so planning ahead is a requirement. The starch and water that has soaked through such cheap plate means it will stick to the table like glue. Trying to move it is a sure fire way to have the entire plate come apart on you.

You can't slide the plate closer or it will likely disappear into the spaghetti and yu'll simply be eating straight off of the table.

Church spaghetti suppers are generally good for this dopey little stunt although the generally do provide a table for you to park your plate on after having to juggle the soggy pile of slippery spaghetti. It beats being having to deal with it on your lap as I once had to do at a party years ago.

There's no way in hell you can rest a cheap, soggy paper plate on your lap without making a super sized mess.

For some odd reason, while churches opt for cheap paper plates, fire halls often use quality plates. It has been my experience that churches often cheap out for some reason or another.

While I have not been to a spaghetti supper in quite some time, I do recall that I generally have a USGI Old School mess kit in my pickup for things of this nature.

This reminds me. I ought to check and see if it is still there. I have not seen it in a while. I might need that for biscuits and gravy at Camp Perry later on this summer. The food consession people might be using cheap plates this year. Being prepared makes things a whole lot nicer.

Anyway, back on task.

A quick check is all it takes to see if it is cheap paper plate night at the church supper. If it is, there's a quick trip back to the pickup and I'm good to go.

The deep dish part of the mess kit can hold the spaghetti and you throw the obligatory garlic bread on top and the other split section is good for the salad portion. It works pretty well.

Comments from other people are generally pretty complimentary. "Looks like you know what you're doing. Next time I'll bring my own plate." is pretty common. One time someone asked, "Eat at church suppers often?"

Take a tip from an old pro.  Bring a mess kit.

To find out why the blog is pink just cut and paste this: NO ANIMALS WERE HARMED IN THE WRITING OF TODAY'S ESSAY

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