Wednesday, November 23, 2016

I met an old classmate today.

He is just as gullible and dumb as he was forty five years ago. I got into line behind him at a Dunkin' Donuts. I wanted coffee.

"Hey, Piccolo! There's a blast from the past! Home for the holiday, I see!"

My parents have been dead for a few years. A cop fell in behind me.

"What's it like coming home?" he asked.

"Just like what I left. The parents are fighting over money and drugs. Money and drugs, money and drugs, money and drugs. It never changes," I replied.

In the mirror I saw the cop's nterest perk up.

"Ma just won a grand in a wet T-shirt contest the other night and they are bickering over whether to buy meth or coke with it," I said. "You'd think they'da smartened up by now. Every time Ma gets methed up she wrecks he damned Harley and winds up in the hospital."

In the mirror the cop looked confused a second, then I saw him do a little mental math. He supressed a smirk.

"Gee, that's a shame," he said. The look on his face told be he's swallowed it hook, line and sinker. He got his coffee and left.

The cop looked at me and whispered "You asshole," but he was grinning. "How long ago did you live here?"

"Graduated in '69," I said. "That's when the cops wouuld hold you beer while you got your license out. I left in '73, I lived the next town over."

"Huh, Do you know Sam Shultz?" he asked. "He graduated there about tht time."

"Yeah, I do. How's he doing?"

"Sam's fine," said the cop. "He's my uncle." 

"Where is he now?" I asked.

The cop gave me his address. "He should be home now," he said.

I took my coffee and drove off to Sam's house. He was shocked to see me.

He asked me what I was up to after all these years and I strted with, "After I got out of the Foreign Legion...."

He shot back with, "Save that grap for someone gullible!"

I like Sam. He's one of the good guys that has actually learned something over the past 40 or so years.

To find out why the blog is pink just cut and paste this: NO ANIMALS WERE HARMED IN THE WRITING OF TODAY'S ESSAY

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