Wednesday, February 23, 2011

Over the years I have been entertained by people that take some of the things I have said


Once someone asked me when I went to school, which I did for a while on my GI bill. "I think it was between the time I got out of jail for arson and a little before I went back inside for bank robbery. The GI bill needed a little help and I got caught," I replied.

An older engineer smirked, but the guy that asked me later gossipped back to the engineer that I had been to prison twice. The engineer, who saw a sucker for a line told him that he and I had met in the joint while he was pulling a stretch for homicide.

What was he thinking? He has a Merchant Mariners Document and he went through the system to get it and he should at least remember that he went through a criminal background check.

Another time I was at a match and was peeling out of my shooters gear on a hot August morning. I had a hooded sweatshirt on under a quilted shooting jacket and as I was removing the sweatshirt, it dragged my T-shirt up, exposing a scar. The guy next to me asked me about it and I casually told him it was from where I caught a Japanese bayonet at Tarawa.

The man, a history teacher, asked me if I would visit his classes and talk about fighting the Japanese Empire.

I guess he knew history pretty well but he sure couldn't count. I was born 8 years after the battle was fought.

I decided that I had better back the bayonet story back by a war and the next person that asked was treated to hearing me tell him that I had caught a Hun bayonet going over the top with Blackjack Pershing back in '18.

At the time I told the kid this I would have had to be about 105 years old.

It got back to me that he was running around telling people that I had been bayoneted in World War One. I laughed.

These days if someone asks about the scar I tell them it was from a Spanish bayonet I caught when I went up Kettle Hill with Colonel Roosevelt.

I figure that if they believe that one, it's on them because I am not 131 years old even if someone thinks I look it.

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