Wednesday, November 25, 2015

I figure someone just got out of the joint

 because I just got a wrong number for the first time in a couple of years. 

Actually I got a wrong number the other day but it was simply someone's grandmother with arthritic fingers that hit a wrong button. The poor old woman apologized and I was kind and easy going about it. No sense being rude to an old woman.

Today's wrong number likely came from someone that just got out of the joint after serving some hard time.

I answered it with a simple 'Hello' and got a surprise.

"Yo! Darrell! You got that fi hunn rit I paid you befoe I got jacked up?" demanded a voice.

"No," I snapped and hung up.

Two minutes later it rang again. "Darrell, I mean it. I ain't f***in' wit choo. I want my f***in' money, Man!"

I hung up again. It rang again.

"I mean it, Man! You get me my motherf***in' money or I'll kick your f***in' ass!"

I hung up again. He didn't call again.

I'd love to see how Darrell is going to squirm when the guy meets up with him.

Several years ago when I got my present cell number I started getting all sorts of calls from people looking for hookers and drugs. I attributed it to the recycling system of telephone numbers. I simply figured that the number I had been assigned was some drug dealer's former burn phone. Or for that matter, maybe his regular phone.

For months I was constantly getting calls from people looking for drugs, whores or money. After the first week of being annoyed, I simply decided to run with it and became a drug dealing least over the phone.

Most people didn't recognize the voice and simply said, "You ain't Darrell!" and never called again. That was a good deal as far as I was concerned.

On the other hand, a small handful of people thought I WAS Darrell and I arranged drug deals and promised to send Fonsica or whoever the hell the whore was to wherever the caller wanted. Of course, the caller wound up on a wild goose chase.

I didn't do this out of particular meanness. I simply did it because I couldn't take all of that crap seriously.

To find out why the blog is pink just cut and paste this: NO ANIMALS WERE HARMED IN THE WRITING OF TODAY'S ESSAY

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