And I was in and out in under 20 minutes and got what I wanted with no problems.
I went to the sign in desk, explained what I wanted and was handed two forms and given a number that was called before the woman could hand me a clipboard. I went to the desk and was served instantly.
I wanted to have my driver's license turned into a so-called 'real ID' so if I fly again I won't have to drag my passport or Z-card with me.
I also knew if I did this I could renew my license for another 4 years on top of the 3 years and 11 months I have left on mine, effectively making my expiration date on my 79th birthday. No trying to renew at 75 if I make it.
Bam. Everything went smoothly and they said inside a week my new one would come in the mail inside a week. The old one actually expired instantly but they gave me a paper rider which if I get stopped makes the old one valid until the new one arrives.
Needless to say, smart ass that I am, I said, "Oh, good! I can sell the old one to some dopey kid to use to buy beer with!" He laughed like hell but the nosy jerk in the booth next to me didn't. He got all bent out of shape.
Now let's look at this carefully. When they card someone for buying beer they swipe your license. The kid would have an invalid one. That doesn't even cover the fact that the picture on it is of an old 71 year old man and the DOB on it says he's have to be 71 years old. What I said made no sense at all as do a lot of things I say, yet this idiot jumped in with both feet and started telling me I could get into all sorts of trouble selling a false ID and so on.
"You're right," I said, contritely. "Maybe I'll just trade it with him for a bag of dope." and started watching two things happen at once.
The jerk blew a 50 amp fuse and the DMV clerk started laughing so hard I was afraid he'd wet his pants. So did the DMV clerk that was waiting on the imbecile.
Finally the idiot figured out he was being trolled and got really angry and started to say something about people like me so I said something about people like him.
"I used to think that God hated me because he made me deal with so many people like you. Then I realized God loves me because he provides me with so many people like you to entertain me."
He didn't know what to say so he just sat there turning a lovely shade of purple.
Then I found out the joke was on me. On the way home I decided to grab a 24 ounce Stella Artois for later on in the evening but my driver's license wouldn't scan. The miracle of modern electronics at it's finest. I couldn't buy my own beer at the ripe old age of 71.
What did I do? What do you think I did? I hung around and found some underage kid with a bogus ID to buy beer for me. Yet one more case of life coming full circle!
Needless to say the young man gave me a good natured bad time about it which I actually rather enjoyed. He was pretty funny and treated me like a teenager that was getting beer bought illegally for him. I acted like a grateful kid and thanked him fo being a cool guy.
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